Who do you call when the last box is packed but you need a final push out the door? Who calls you when the divorce papers are signed but she needs a final push to file? Who knows your actual weight, not just the DMV stat? Whose political career could you destroy with a single raise of your eyebrow? In the deep and vast spectrum of friendship, we've all got one soul who will unquestionably have our back without judgement or pause. I have Teal. Teal has me.
I've just returned from Miami, where Teal lives with her two daughters. She and I speak every day, yet this was the first time since 2003 that we'd seen each other in person. (Picture five months joined at the hip in college, a sudden falling out, and a Facebook reunion eight years later.) We've since realized that the very things that might have held us together then—our insecurities and our desperate attempts to hide them with external perfection—were what pushed us apart.
If only we'd known, we mused last weekend. If only I'd known that behind her buoyant façade eddied whirlpools of pain that would spit her out, near-drowned, a decade later. If only she'd known that across campus I moved silently from class to class, wraithlike in my isolation. We rode that train of conversation for a bit before we made the decision to stop speculating. If we'd known then, we wouldn't be as we are today. Teal might not have her daughters. I might not be writing to you now. Our lives re-intersected at the moment we needed each other most. To question that is to question the strength and courage we've drawn from our parallel struggles. Just as our friendship is an exercise in unconditional acceptance, so too is the path that it has taken.
Thus, Easter saw us tooling around Miami in the minivan, alternately reveling in and laughing at our neuroses. (I can't stay awake past 10 pm on pain of death; Teal won't let even the most seasoned pedicurist touch her feet.) We had an awful lot of fun for a chronic workaholic who hasn't had a vacation in eons and a full-time mother who spent her first holiday away from her kids. Yet aside from returning home with a more vivid picture of Teal's physical reality, I don't feel any differently. After all, bonded for life is bonded for life.
All photos are my own.
this is my favorite post of yours. xo
Best post I’ve seen in a very long time. What’s better than reconnecting with someone you love?? Also so glad to see you connected w my gal, Jenn! Love her!
i long for a friend like this. i’m so glad you have one. love the photos and the way you could write about this. a perfect marriage of word and image.
So beautiful. Thanks for this, Anne. xo.
This is really lovely, Anne. <3
Beautifully written Anne! And I’m impressed by your photography skills 🙂
Gorgeous post Anne, what lucky ladies you are to have each other.
I think friends are more important than anything else in our lives. This post was so lovely. You’re so very lucky to have each other.
I love this Anne. There’s nothing like reconnecting.
Such a beautifully poignant post. Thank you for finding the words to describe a familiar friendship in my repetoire. It seems its those we quarrel with are those we learn the most from. So humble and open to life. It’s why your blog is bookmarked for me. Cheers.
I love your writing Anne.
Thank you for sharing this Anne. So glad you and your friend reconnected, as studies show time with girlfriends increases seratonin, it is the ultimate gift to share with lifes besties. Love what Michelle said about you being humble and open to life, I appreciate you for these reasons. 🙂